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Original art credit and concept : Neverboy by Tyler Jenkins

Dad’s Silhouette

Praise God, I’ve crossed the finish line for a 30km run merely 2 days ago. It was a humble big deal indeed! It wasn’t easy at all. At times when I forced another step forward, my whole body was screaming in pain and protest. And at a few moments, I was on the verge of tears. Because the physical and mental strength were pushed more than what I thought I can bear. But hey, this writing isn’t about me (it was on FB), this is very much about my journey and a huge part of it comprised of my hero, my dad.

At KM 11, I saw the familiar 9128U parked at the opposing roadside.

“Petey, I need your car on Saturday. Easier to follow these gals using an auto vehicle.”

And of course my eyes automatically searched and found my #1 supporter beside the car, waving with one hand as I waved back, and another hand holding his handphone recording a video.

At about KM15, around mile 7 airport roundabout, the vehicle was spotted again. This time my #1 supporter brought bananas, and more sweet drink. The sugar was a good boost, but seeing my dad was a bigger boost. I took the headlamp and glow sticks from him and prepared for the sunset and night run.

He appeared again a few times along the way. At KM 23, I had long stopped running and started walking. Pete was driving and I can hear dad and Pete and Kakak cheering from the moving vehicle “Do you need water?”   “Hey, do you wanna get into the car?”. Dad even offered the bananas, proudly harvested from his own farm, much to the gratitude of other runners. That’s my dad!

So my true ordeal started KM25 onwards. I walked very slowly because my body was not well. I could feel blisters. My legs muscles were overworked, tired and in constant pain. If I stop, they will be shaking involuntary. If I walk too fast, they were threatening a cramp. The sky had turned dark and the road was poorly lit. The runners in front and behind me were very far away. At that moment it felt pretty lonely. I know damn sure giving up is not an option. The fighter in me will go on no matter what it takes. I was half limping.

9128U reappeared at -KM4. Dad gave me water again. I told them that I was suffering… Dad hopped down from the car and said to me “I’ll go with you! Petey, take the car.”

And my #1 supporter started to grab my arm and walked tad a bit too fast for me. I had to tell him that I will walk behind him. So dad led the way in the dark, set the pace. Sometimes he looked back to see where I was. Many times, I cursed he didn’t. He didn’t understand why did I have to move like a tortoise.

“Nevermind la, slowly. You are not going to win the top prizes anyway.”

But reality hits me hard. As I look at the silhouette walking a few yards in front of me, one KM after another, my heart was flooded with love. This man, took me to my first hunting trip when I was a kid. When I left home for the first time for Form 6, I was crying (no amount of tissue paper was enough) in the plane but he was beside me. He isn’t an educated man, he always asks us how to spell this how to spell that, but he plucked up the courage to go to Jabatan Pendidikan Melaka with me when I was 18 to get me a seat for my Form 6 schooling… and sometimes he would blame himself for not having better ability to send me for overseas studies. At my 20, he insisted to visit my University and look at my room and see who my roomies were. He and mom entered the Convocation Hall with me when I was 25. At my 26 (and I was beginning to feel embarrassed), he wanted to go to Ipoh with me and sent me to my first day of work, reporting to duty lapor diri to the Ministry of Health. He was supportive when I resigned. When I was 33, he accompanied me all the way to Frankfurt for my Diploma exam and was whatsapp telling people that I did it, even before I actually sat for the exam. He was with me during the grand opening of my first clinic, and then my second. He was always with me along the way….. not many people get to boast of things like this…. Oh God, I am….

So of course at KM30, -KM0 the finishing line, (I age 35 now, excuse me) my dad was following close behind me with his camera filming the victorious moment. He had walked the final 4km with me.

Dad. Thank you. Even as I know that you will still walk many other journeys with me, walk me down the aisle, sometimes still irritate me… as long as heavens allows; I pray that we walk to heaven okay? That’s the ultimate finishing line.

Happy Birthday, my superhero dad.

Password please

Somebody just rang me up and asked me for my internet Wifi password. Some nerves! He’s a staff of mine.

But he doesn’t even stay here. What if he hollers my WEP key with the whole quarters, and everyone shares my line but not my bill? It’s not a what-if case, he’s certainly gonna talk.

So in a nice way, I told him NO. But NO is never a good word, no matter how you say it. By now, he probably hollered to the whole quarters that I am stingy~

It’s my right to say NO !
I am downright stupid if I said OK.

So why am I feeling bad? =.=

A conversation I can’t quite forget

Not too long ago, we were in a lecture hall, listening to a very boring lecture that I now forgot what was that about. Chingku seated between Elegant Chong and myself.

Then Chingku nudged me, pointed to the next table meant for 3, and said quietly.
‘Hey see there… Alice looks lonely seating alone. Why don’t you sit over there and chat with her?’

‘Chat?’ I looked at Chingku, almost incredulously. ‘No kidding, I can be a great friend. But you know I am not a good chat person. Me no conversationalist.’

With her blank innocent face, Chingku said, ‘Yesterday, you just sat down at dinner table and successfully invited 2 more new friends for the paintball game.’

‘Uh… that’s different. I am… introvert, buddy. Don’t you know?’ Chingku, my great university pal doesn’t know or realize that I suck at chatting?

‘Nop, I think you’re extrovert. Let’s ask Elegant Chong, she knows you very well too.’ Chingku turned to the other side, and Elegant Chong suddenly got shot by a random question ‘Is Alexis introvert or extrovert?’

‘Ext.’
‘See?’ Chingku turned to me again.

Gee.. I must be a very good actor, or… I think I know what was going on.

Just a week prior to this conversation, simple but significant to me, I was wondering (almost everyday) what is my gift, and also how can I serve God, the church or the people?
Seems like it’s group base.

I had tough time trying to chat with individuals staff in my clinic. Thinking of what topic, how to respond, etc. But when I address the group non personally, I can crack jokes naturally, they felt more at ease and more responsive. Via Induksi, this trait became increasingly evident. With Chingku alone, we bonded via quiet PSP or note passings. With roomie Elegant, we can chat in the room, watch TV and passed junk food. But when the group gathered, I became kinda noisy dominant =.=

Here’s the conclusion =)
I am introvert. Calm and rational.
I can be loud and outgoing, especially when addressing a group.
Me a conversationalist… mmm, that needs a lot of improving work.

There… friends help you to discover a lil bit more about yourself.