Untitled

 

Original art credit and concept : Neverboy by Tyler Jenkins

Like a Monster

He came into the surgery, with a face so unattractive that whatever you imagine, it could be worse. He wasn’t disfigured, he was just born with a very not handsome face.

But he is a beautiful person.

Past the layer of physical appearance, he spoke nicely, cracked a joke or two, he listened to what the Dr is saying. He needed help with his teeth.

“… I look like a monster.”

He was dealt with a very tough card and he has to continue the game with it. Unfortunately, it is not a game.

Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t think much about his appearance until he said that sentence. And after he did, I imagined how challenging his life be… being born this way. Strangers may not favour him, the first glance at him automatically put people on guard-mode. People won’t be naturally attracted to him, jobs aren’t readily available for him. Like it or not, the world goes easier for physically beautiful people. That’s the sad truth.

The brief encounter with him reminded myself not to be so shallow. Know a person past skin-depth. A person’s true beauty and self worth lies not on what he/she cannot control (the face he/she is born with); but on what he/she can control for example acts of kindness, courtesy, etc.

There is Goodness

We made the payment and were on our way out of Servay Penampang. My mom, Ry’s family and a friend called Patty. Suddenly, Ry and Patty lunged forward as if they saw gold for grabs on the floor.

Nah.

Just an old man, with his right hand holding a big bag of groceries and his left, attempting to hold a few plastic box containers stacked together with their covers dangling dangerously waiting for an avalanche at the slightest trigger of imbalance. Of course, the container boxes dropped on the floor.

He stood where he was, and did not (or perhaps could not, or probably would not) bend down to pick up the containers, something quite impossible to do with only one free hand. Ry and Patty dashed to him, picked up what he dropped. Not only was he physically not too responsive, his face showed lack of expression too. Specifically, lack of acknowledgement.

“Just here.” Pointing to where he wanted Ry to place the boxes.

That done, the uncle stood beside the boxes with hard eyes and unsmiling face. Ry went the extra mile to get a plastic bag with the intention to tie the boxes+covers together to ease the transportation process later. As Ry bent low the second time for the uncle, about to touch uncle’s boxes, uncle held out a palm and said “Nevermind.”

And we left him. It all happened in less than a minute. For a habitually helpful guy like Ry, he probably didn’t think too much of it. But it bothers me to see such an unfriendly demeanour and at the end of the brief encounter, not even any gesture or words of gratitude.

I told Patty as we were walking towards our vehicle. “The uncle seems to take this very suspiciously.” The mistrusting eyes, the defensive stance, unwillingness to connect, etc. “Really?” Oh, apparently she didn’t think too much of this too.

Later that night, Patty asked me “Remember why I wanna participate in mission trips?” She did tell me before but too embarrassed to admit that I forgot, I replied “Tell me again.”

“It is like the uncle just now. I hope people get to know that… there is kindness and goodness in this world. And if I can, I want to be the reason someone believes in the goodness of people.”

 

Not Defeated

Almost 6 months of preparation.

With the mind and body set to do it.

Only to be denied.

“How’s the peak?”

“The peak…? She was crying and refused to see anybody…”

Aki Nabalu we love and respect.

Dejected and defeated. I texted a friend.

 

 

No…. came the reply.

You are not defeated,

You haven’t got the chance to conquer.