Tiada yang Mustahil !

I received a very interesting gift today.

A Bucket List book ?!

We have heard of bucket list at some point of our lives. According to Google, bucket list is a number of experiences or achievements that a person hopes to have or accomplish during their lifetime. 

When I first learnt the term, I mentally set a few things in my mind, achieved some, haven’t achieved some and forgot the rest.

But with a tangible book… oh gosh, this could be a different story lor.

By merely flipping through the empty pages, I caught myself thinking… What is my dream? Which places on earth do I wanna see? What crazy thing do I wanna do next? Or not-so-crazy stuff that I would like to learn or try. And that was pretty exciting,tho just a thought. Everything starts with a seed of thought.

So when was the last time you did something for the first time? Nothing is impossible.

_________________

Oh by the way. The giver of the book. We’ve come a long long way. Thanks, Lina.

Excited for the Battle

Definitely ‘Walking on Water’ Category

I didn’t sleep well last night. I am usually a light sleeper and wake up many times throughout the night, yep, but last night was not usual. Whenever I stir, there was a pounding headache. I am not sure if the headache causes me to wake up or did I have trouble falling asleep again because of it. When I did, the cycle will repeat. Fall asleep-wake up with headache- fall asleep- wake up with headache.

What’s happening, Lord?

Call me crazy, the spirit realm is battling. I started a serious fast 2 days ago. I am not foreign to fasting and praying… However recently, I am being reminded acutely that as a Christian, I am not doing justice to the super powerful sword that I have in my hand. Prayer. Desperate ones.

When was the last time I asked God for something so big that my limited human mind cannot comprehend? When was the last time I ask God to intervene in my outwardly-ok-inwardly-deteriorating family situation? Did I ever seriously ask God about my future? Or desperately cry out that God, multiply my Life Group from one to 3, God, multiply my church! Or asking God in a way that I should believe that it will happen, to move His mighty hands over this wretched country of mine? Can’t even remember the last time I ask God to bless and prosper my business… And there are problems and unsolved issues in my life that are buried so far deep in an old well. Shall we deal with it, Lord? And have I properly talked to God about the new place we are doing up?

Everything is prepared. All you need to do is ask, and it shall be granted unto you.

More than anything else, more than all the problems I wished solved, more than the blessings and prosperity God can pour out, more than the blessings of love… at this moment, I really desire and hunger for the presence of God in my spirit. God, I want you more than anything else in the world right now. I am desperate for you!

So, I began my fast with those feeling of dissatisfaction. Come on, there should be more than life as it is now, and I want it, Lord. I am not going to limit what You are going to do in my life this time. I strive for breakthrough now. I want a new heart, a fresh spirit. I need a reNEWed better me !

When I had trouble sleeping last night, I just lie on the bed and randomly prayed for… 1 major issue – the new place, and 1 minor issue – heal my buddy who is having a toothache that is giving her a really cranky mood.

And fell asleep and woke up again(the headache was always there, right side). Okay, now to break the chains and soul ties that unable me to reach higher. And mom and dad.

Fell asleep and again, woke up ! and the cycle repeats. It gets very tiring. That was when I asked. What’s happening, Lord? And God impressed in my heart that all my prayers didn’t go unheard, the angels are working upon it and certain issues need a direct engagement with the darkness.

Eph 6:12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers of this darkness, against evil, spiritual forces in the heavens.

The devil isn’t bloody happy. Fuck. As I am typing this, the left side of my head started to pound…

I belong to Jesus. My God is a good God. My life is good, and going to be better. I desire nothing else, but only fix my eyes on God. I am excited to fight and engage the darkness. I am awaken to fight. I won’t stand at the sideline. If I perish in the battlefield, so be it.

This morning, I woke up to a phone call. The contractor called to say he is working double time to get the new place ready next month. I’m gonna fast and pray that it will be sooner than that. And my friend with the toothache? After pestering me for many days, the pain is just gone. (By the way, I couldn’t diagnose the source of her problem). Instead of holding a palm to her face as she used to for the past few days, now she can’t stop yakking.

Thank you Lord! This is just the beginning. We still have more work to do. Humble me and teach me. Unclutter me and let me be amazingly sensitive to the Holy Spirit. I open my heart to you, to do what only You can.

 

Looks can be Deceiving

It happened yesterday and happened again twice today.

“Wah ! Dr, you look so young !”

“My looks can be deceiving. Har har har.” I have default responses to certain remarks from my clients. This is one of it.

And more often than not, they can’t contain themselves and ask the next question. “What are you, in your 20s??”

Oh well…. I usually look at the client and try to hear it out from his or her tone. Damn unlikely you are interested to know the secret of my youth. More likely you wanna gauge what is my age and proportionate it to what my clinical experience and expertise will be.

However, I always take it as a compliment.

Tho I am in my 30s, I feel like I am in my 20s.

I think like a 30s, still play like a 20s.

When I am travelling now, I prefer hotel pillows, compared to backpacking and double deckers then.

There are fine wrinkles on my face, that I could ignore then but not now.

I prefer reflective Hillsong worship now, tho still tuned to Oasis and some other alternatives like I did 10 years ago.

I pride myself in engaging my mind and learning new stuff now, be it a new language or a computer skill. But I still don’t read the newspaper as I never have the habit to when I was in my 20s.

Naw, I won’t deny my age. Maturity and wonderful life experiences came with it. Then again, it’s just a number. Some things change, some doesn’t. Ry once quoted “Growing old is mandatory, growing up is a choice.”

I just (teehee) bought a water pistol today. I need to arm myself for the water fight next week. At no other time and place, but Songkran at Chiang Mai! I got home and tested the plastic toy and was mighty happy with it. Makes me feel like a Bond girl.

“Aik. Kecik nye” my ol’ buddy commented. (Hi there!)

If I can bargain an M16 equivalent watergun for 300Baht or less, I’m gonna get it. OK, time to learn some Thai words specifically the shopping chapter.